Satire Archives – The College View

Giraffes vs Penguins: The Generational Debate

February 15, 2023

The question has plagued me for years now, and I’ve come to realise that the only solution is a truly logical and analytical approach. So I’ve got a list of aspects I’ve written up with

Articles

Why the Media Production Society has fallen off

February 1, 2023

After years of domination at the top of DCU’s Clubs and Societies leaderboard, it has officially been confirmed that the Media Production Society has fallen off. In this article, I endeavour to discuss the myriad

The 5 Least Sexy College Degrees in DCU

February 1, 2023

From Chemistry to Computing, there are so many courses on offer here at DCU, all with varying levels of sexiness. Though very subjective, the facts are the facts- Communications takes the cake as the sexiest

Screw the costumes, keep the cost down.

November 13, 2022

Just as the leaves blow through the streets this fall season, devil ears, cat’s tails, and angelwings roll around the dark corners of Camden Street. On Halloween, we see both sides of thescale, where costumes

The Case of Pub vs Club

October 12, 2022

The battle of Pub vs Club continues to rage on in the heads of twenty to thirty year olds across the country. I only refrain from writing, “across the world”, as I presume the French

How to Survive Freshers’ Flu

October 12, 2022

Fresher’s flu, the painful phenomenon that takes over your body and reminds you that four nights ofconsecutive drinking has consequences, but it was worth it because you got the shift in Ryan’s. I’m genuinely convinced

Who Is The True Heir To The British Throne?

September 28, 2022

With the UK electing their new King very recently, there’s been a lot of buzz about the Royal Family and who the next heir to the throne will be. Instead of going through family trees

How To Survive First Year

September 28, 2022

The percentage of Leaving Cert students who continued to third level education last year rose to 66.1%. However, according to figures from The Times, one in every six college students are dropping out in their

Craziest International Hangover Cures

September 28, 2022

Last night was awesome! You attended Shite Night at Nubar, had a lot of booze with your friends, probably made some other questionable decisions, but overall had a great time. Now you’re dealing with a

Planning King Charles’ Luxury Irish Holiday

September 28, 2022

Now that our estranged neighbours have a new face on their five pound note, it’s only tradition that they begin their pilgrimage over here to Ireland. King Charles has declared that he wants to visit

DCU? Are you actually kidding me?

November 6, 2013

Oh. My God. One of our southsoide comrades who was marooned in DCU tells all of their harrowing experience.

Government to cut €25 billion after decimal point mix up

October 23, 2013

It seems they made a mistake in last week’s budget…

Birds, bees and the age-old struggle to play it safe

October 9, 2013

An in-depth guide for every college student getting to grips with you-know-what.

Getting the foot in the door

March 29, 2013

You’ve got it, finally. That elusive piece of paper you’ve been working towards for the last three or four years – well, for some it could take the guts of a decade. The days of

Blame it on the Weatherman

March 20, 2013

Ireland, probably one of the only countries to experience the four seasons in one day, with of course the exception of our sunshine state: Wexford. Monday, March 11 2013 highlighted the ostentatious weather we so

What it looks like from behind the bar

March 6, 2013

Working in bars can be great, because let’s face it, people always provide more entertainment when they’re drunk. And when things are quiet behind the bar there’s nothing better than watching drunks go about their

A culchie’s first day in the Big Smoke

March 6, 2013

The cows were milked early on the Tuesday night and I visited Granny. She had more masses said for me to get into college than Our Lord himself. Granny was a Fine Gael loving woman

Yes, no or nothing at all

February 20, 2013

Last Tuesday, just 5% of students voted in the Student’s Union’s referendum to abolish referendums. The SU, while expecting a poor turnout, was still surprised at the low number of students voting. The SU Commander-In-Chief commented: “It’s a

Women can have the last laugh

February 20, 2013

“You’re very funny for a girl.” If I had a euro for every time I’ve heard that phrase I’d have enough money to afford a sex change in order to be accepted as humorous. The